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Men and Women
52 aphorisms · 12 comments
Aphorisms in This Category
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# · Not So Good (10 ratings) · submitted 1997
Girls are like pianos. When they're not upright, they're grand.
# · Not So Good (9 ratings) · submitted 1997
A man is as good as he has to be, and a woman is as bad as she dares.
# · Not So Good (9 ratings) · submitted 1997
My notion of a wife at forty is that a man should be able to change her, like a bank note, for two twenties.
# · Very Good (3 ratings) · submitted 1997
Large increases in cost with questionable increases in performance can be tolerated only in race horses and women.
# · Not So Good (2 ratings) · submitted 1997
A woman is only a woman, but a good cigar is a smoke.
# · Bad (2 ratings) · submitted 1997
Being kissed by a man who didn't wax his moustache was like eating an egg without salt.
# · Bad (2 ratings) · submitted 1997
If you want a high performance woman, I can go from zero to bitch in less than 2.1 seconds.
# · Bad (3 ratings) · submitted 1997
Women who seek to be equal with men lack ambition.
# · Unrated · submitted 1997
Bachelors know more about women than married men do. If they didn't, they'd be married too.
# · Good (one rating) · submitted 1997
A woman may very well form a friendship with a man, but for this to endure, it must be assisted by a little physical antipathy.
# · Unrated · submitted 1997
If women didn't exist, all the money in the world would have no meaning.
# · Unrated · submitted 1997
A bachelor is a selfish, undeserving guy who has cheated some woman out of a divorce.
Don Quinn, in Love and Hate and Men and Women
# · Unrated · submitted 1997
Flirting is the gentle art of making a man feel pleased with himself.
Helen Rowland, in Love and Hate and Men and Women
# · Unrated · submitted 1997
When God created two sexes, he may have been overdoing it.
# · Unrated · submitted 1997
There are really not many jobs that actually require a penis or a vagina, and all other occupations should be open to everyone.
# · Unrated · submitted 1997
Men mistake friendship, but not sex, for love; women mistake sex, but not friendship, for love.
# · Unrated · submitted 1997
Give a man free hands and you'll know where to find them.
# · Unrated · submitted 1997
You come out of a woman and you spend the rest of your life trying to get back inside.
# · Unrated · submitted 1997
A diplomat is a man who can convince his wife she'd look stout in a fur coat.
Unknown, in Law and Politics and Men and Women
# · Unrated · submitted 1997
A man needs a mistress, just to break the monogamy.
Unknown, in Love and Hate and Men and Women
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